What are some of the things we work on in Parent Coaching? Have you ever wondered what it’s all about?
Parent Coaching is a one-on-one format so you can get direct help and support. We brainstorm together to find the best fit behavior tools to help things run smoothly in your home. We work as a team- you are the expert on your family, I’m the expert on behavior. Together we can find the simplest path to better communication and connection in your family.
Parent Coaching may sound new to you, a little out there, or too woo-woo. But it’s a pretty amazing gift and I’d love to get to know your family, too!
Parent Coaching is like having your own parenting book author on call. It’s having a behavior analyst who is there to be your support system, your guide, and your encourager.
Some of the things I’ve helped families with include:
- Bedtime battles
- Aggression and what to do with big feelings
- Emotional regulation strategies
- Mindful parenting and identifying family values
- Individualized plans for how to react when a problem behavior occurs
- Individualized strategies to prevent problem behavior
- Teaching skills to replace a problem behavior
- Visual schedules
- Positive reinforcement systems that work, and then fading those out when ready
One amazing family I worked with was dealing with power struggles and bedtime was lasting hours each night. Their young child would scream, shout, and even be aggressive toward parents at bedtime. (Actually, this describes multiple families I’ve had the honor to support but let’s stick with just one for ease of this example.)
These parents had read so many parenting books, listened to parenting lectures- you name it. So, they were following well-intentioned advice to be consistent with their bedtime routine. But here’s the thing. If the routine isn’t working, consistency isn’t going to magically fix it. If what you are doing isn’t working, change things up. Once you find the combo that works, then go for consistency.
This particular family went from a rigid & consistent bedtime routine to letting their child choose the order of events each night. We made a visual schedule of the evening routine and then cut it up into individual pieces! Gasp! Cut up that visual schedule! The child then could choose the order each night (within parent set boundaries). The people who preach consistency would hate to see this! But guess what- it helped!
We also worked together to find a best fit replacement behavior for their child to SAY when they were upset. How can they effectively communicate that they don’t like bedtime or other things? They can communicate this feeling even when bedtime still must go on.
This same family also worked on emotional regulation tools. We worked on calming strategy choice boards and practicing with the phrase “What does your body need?
We also worked on rigid mindsets of the parents- learning to be more flexible and find ways to better communicate with their child. We made sure every single action plan they ultimately chose aligned with their unique family values. We weighed options for behavioral interventions against these values as well as assessing if my recommendations were doable with time and energy constraints- especially at bedtimes. We are all tired at that point and need to take that into account when making plans!
This family is flourishing. When I check in with them over a year later, they share wonderful reports. It fills my heart just writing about it right now. They are amazing parents who just needed a little hand holding to get through a difficult period. And now they have tools that they can revisit when the next bump in the road comes.
Parent Coaching is successful when it’s a partnership between parents who care and someone who actually is trained and experienced (don’t get me started on all the ‘experts’ out there on social media!). It’s successful because everything can be tailored to that family’s immediate needs and then aligned to the family’s values.
I am so very thankful for the short periods I’ve gotten to be a small part of each of my clients’ family life. And I’m thankful for the ability to continue to support families in this direct way.
To get started with parent coaching, book your free brainstorming session by clicking here: https://www.parentingwithaba.org/courses/
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