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All too often I hear moms (including myself) questioning why their child would do whatever behavior is a problem right now.
But why won’t she eat anything besides bread?
Why doesn’t he listen to me?
Why won’t she just follow directions because I told her to?
Why? Why? Why?!

Unless you are a professional BCBA or psychologist or something, just give up this line of questioning. It will make you crazy. We as parents can’t always know the why. There is no reason why. It just is.

Okay, thanks. How is this helpful, again?

Change your focus. You can’t know the why. Give up asking why. Instead focus on the providing positive supports for the replacement behavior.

Teach your child the behavior that is appropriate for the situation, reward them for engaging in the appropriate behavior, and give choices to foster independence.

Shift your focus, mom. Look at the WHAT you want your child to do, HOW you can make it easy and rewarding for them to do so, and then smile. Stop worrying about the WHY.

Why should you follow this advice? Because I said so. Or because it is backed by decades of behavior analysis research. Boo-yah.

Want to learn more ABA strategies for moms? Check out my e-book!